There's a movie I really like - it's hilarious but can be really deep at parts. It's called Stardust, and one of my favorite scenes is the monologue Yvaine gives to Tristan, after he's been turned into a rat. She doesn't think he can understand her, so she's less inhibited in what she says (isn't that how we all are?). Here's what she says.
"You know when I said I knew little about love? That wasn't true. I know a lot about love. I've seen it...centuries and centuries of it, and it was the only thing that made watching your world bearable. All those wars. Pain, lies, hate... It made me want to turn away and never look down again.
"But when I see the way that mankind loves... You could search to the furthest reaches of the universe and never find anything more beautiful. So yes, I know that love is unconditional. But I also know that it can be unpredictable, unexpected, uncontrollable, unbearable and strangely easy to mistake for loathing, and... What I'm trying to say, Tristan is... I think I love you.
"Is this love, Tristan? I never imagined I'd know it for myself. My heart... It feels like my chest can barely contain it. Like it's trying to escape because it doesn't belong to me anymore. It belongs to you. And if you wanted it, I'd wish for nothing in exchange - no gifts. No goods. No demonstrations of devotion. Nothing but knowing you loved me too. Just your heart, in exchange for mine.
What do we expect in love? Do we expect others to prove their love for us? I hope not, but can we ask for a little confirmation that they love us in return? So we know our heart hasn't been given in vain? Is that okay? In the movie Across the Universe, the main girl sings a song about the main guy, telling him that she wants to be in love with him, but she's been in love before and is worried... here's what the lyrics are (all the songs in this movie are Beatles songs, by the way):
If I fell in love with you
Would you promise to be true
And help me understand
'cause I've been in love before
And I found that love was more
Than just holding hands
If I give my heart to you
I must be sure
From the very start
That you would love me more than her
If I trust in you, oh please
Don't run and hide
If I love you too, oh please
Don't hurt my pride like her
'cause I couldn't stand the pain
And I would be sad if our new love was in vain
So I hope you see that I
Would love to love you
And that she will cry
When she learns we are two
cause I couldn't stand the pain
and I would be sad if our new love was in vain
Kinda sad, but I think when your heart has been broken before, it tends to make you more cautious, and you want more of a reassurance that it's going to be better this time. But ultimately, if you truly love someone, you feel like Yvaine did.
"And if you wanted it, I'd wish for nothing in exchange - no gifts. No goods. No demonstrations of devotion. Nothing but knowing you loved me too. Just your heart, in exchange for mine."
Yeah, so...don't turn left out of the drop off on the east side of the Wilkinson Center. You might get pulled over. How do I know? Well, I did it, and got pulled over. Interesting experience, as I had no idea why it was happening.Anyway, so the cop takes my license and registration and asks if I know why I was pulled over. I of course tell him no - he informs me that I made an illegal left turn out of the Wilk parking lot, and asks also for my BYU ID, even though I'd informed him I was no longer a student (still don't know why he wanted it).So he takes forEVER to get it done, and finally comes back and asks if I have any Provo tickets I haven't taken care of. I say no, and he tells me I have a warrant out for my arrest!!!Of course at this point I start freaking out and asking why. I mean, what the heck?! So after a few seconds of this and him grilling me, he says, "Oh, but it's not April," and winks at my girlfriend (who is in the passenger seat) while handing back my license, ID and registration."Oh, that's harsh. That's just rough." We all start laughing. But he said he did that since he wasn't going to give me the $50 fine. You got me, Mr. Police Officer, sir. I swear, I'm not as think as you drunk I am.
Apparently, Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow today. Six more weeks of winter weather before the advent of spring. Dangit.
Now, why in the heck do we turn our winter weather prediction over to a little, fuzzy animal? That's what I want to know. Doesn't that seem a little ridiculous to any of you? Well, I figured out where the tradition came from, actually, by doing a brief internet search (what did we do before the advent of the world wide web, anyway?).
According to an old German superstition (central Pennsylvania was originally colonized by Germans), if a hibernating animal sees its shadow on Candlemas, there will be six more months of winter. If the animal doesn't see its shadow, there will be an "early" spring.
So....if it's sunny and it can see his shadow (aka spring-like conditions), we'll have more winter. If it's cloudy and it can't see his shadow (aka winter conditions), we'll have an early spring. My question for my German friends is this: are all your traditions counter-intuitive like this? Seems pretty dumb to me.
Oh well - I guess if this prediction holds true, it means I'll actually get a chance to go skiing this season, since I haven't had any money to do so yet. But people come on - let's turn the weather predicting over to the professionals, not a furry rodent, no matter how cute it may be.
I know that many of my faith will have similar feelings today, and many will even write similar blogs to the one I am about to write, on the day of the funeral of President Gordon Bitner Hinckley. It was a touching tribute to the man whose life touched so many. As the president of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for the last 12+ years, one third of the current members of the church were baptised since he became the prophet.
Bishop Burton mentioned the things which the presidents of the church are remembered for. President Benson is remembered for his warnings of pride and his counsel to remember the Book of Mormon. President Hunter is remembered for his counsel on temple worthiness. Once President Hinckley was asked what he thought he would be remembered for. He said, "I'm afraid I will be remembered as the prophet who no one listened to."
I hope we don't forget what he taught us. I hope we take it to heart and actually apply his counsel to our lives. President Hinckley is the prophet of my youth. He has been the prophet since I was old enough to be in the "youth" program.
But I'm not sad - I am grateful that President Hinckley has entered into his rest. Peace be with him and with his family.
...Never make a pretty woman your wife
One of my favorite songs, performed by Jimmy Soul - I think it's hilarious. Anyway, I just thought I'd share a funny anecdote about it.
One time my whole family was in the Suburban, driving around, and this song came on the radio. Of course, we all know it, and we were all singing along. At the end of the song, my mom turned to my dad and asked, "Are you happy?"
"I'm miserable."
Genius, Dad. Pure genius.
Let me begin by saying that this is an incredibly dangerous topic about which to write, but I'm going to risk it. And let me just say, yes - your baby is adorable. And yes, I may be lying.
Let me explain.
There is a saying that goes something along the lines of, all babies are beautiful. While this is a nice saying that makes everyone get warm fuzzies inside, it is actually a lie, perpetuated by nearly all women, to make mothers of unattractive babies feel better.
Let's face it - there are some ugly babies out there. Now, some people would genuinely argue with me and say, "No there aren't! All babies are beautiful!" I would venture to say that these individuals are the kinds of people who see the beauty in everyone. And I'm not saying that we shouldn't look for the inner beauty of each individual we meet. In fact, I'm strongly opposed to people being judged solely on physical appearance. But let's be honest with ourselves - there are some people out there who are physically unattractive. And think about it - if all babies are beautiful, where do ugly adults come from? Did they completely change from being beautiful to being ugly simply by growing up? Maybe. But not likely.
All I'm saying is that there are some physically unattractive babies in the world, and people need to publicly acknowledge the fact. Yes, all babies are precious gifts from God, and it's amazing to see new life created that is so fresh and innocent, but we needn't go so far as to say the kid is adorable, beautiful, pretty, or the most attractive baby we've ever seen...unless we mean it.
That having been said, I will wax hypocritical and return to my original comment: yes, your baby is adorable... But please don't ask me to elaborate.
I got two letters today. One was tax information from my former employer: the agency I did my PR internship with. I originally thought I was going to be offered a job with them, but didn't get it. As a matter of fact, they even originally said they were going to offer it to me, then changed their minds. That was disappointing the first time, and continues to be disappointing when I think about it.
The other letter was from an organization I interviewed with for a PR position. They said thank you - you're great and all - just not great enough. And so, I am still a college graduate with no occupation and no career interviews pending. But eventually I'm sure I'll find something.
I've also found out recently about several friends from my mission / other church-related acquaintances, who have decided to leave the church, and/or who are not living in accordance with the principles of the gospel anymore. It's really hard to know that they should choose to take their lives in different directions, but all I can do is continue to love them and support them, and hope and pray they will come back to the church.
That's life, that's what all the people say.
You're riding high in April,
Shot down in May
But despite all the seemingly negative things around me, my mind is called back to the good things. I remember how much family and friends love me and want to see me succeed. I remember that I'm going to be employed shortly - not in my dream career job, but at least in something that will help me pay the bills and enable me to keep looking for that dream job. I remember that I'm doing my best to stay strong in my faith, to remember the atonement of my Savior. I remember how wonderful I felt last night reading the Book of Mormon. I remember that no matter how bad life seems sometimes, there's always a way out. And as long as I focus on what I can control instead on what I cannot, I will be happy and successful, and things will work out. Maybe not necessarily as I expected, but I know it will be good.
I've been a puppet, a pauper, a pirate,
A poet, a pawn and a king.
I've been up and down and over and out
And I know one thing:
Each time I find myself, flat on my face,
I pick myself up and get back in the race.
It will work out - I know that. And that's life.
