New Moon

I read the books, it's true. I even enjoyed them. You can even read some of my previous blogs for my feelings on that. However, I thought the first movie was one of the worst films I've ever seen (and I've seen some lame movies). The ONLY reason this movie did well at the box office is because of the Twilight book readers. If this had been a stand-alone movie, it would have tanked.

Now, my major issue with this movie was the casting. First of all, the vampires are supposed to be incredibly attractive to their prey, right? Remember when all the Twilighters freaked out when Robert Pattinson was cast? They didn't think he was attractive enough to be Edward (which is true - and what's with that hair??). But then when the movie came out, they somehow all reversed their positions? And Nikki Clark (Rosalie) is very pretty, but she's supposed to be playing an incredibly beautiful, blonde vampire. She should be the most beautiful person in the film. But she's a brunette, and the blonde hair doesn't work for her. They should have cast someone with an already pale complexion and light-colored hair. And don't get me started on how Jasper always looks like he's constipated. (I did like Alice, Emmett, and Carlisle, though.)

But worse than those casting decisions, let's talk about Edward and Bella. The two main characters - the ones to whom we should feel the closest connection - suck. Pattinson is an okay actor - for example, I'm sure he could find success on the Disney Channel...maybe. But Kristen Stewart? She's quite possibly the worst actress I've ever seen. Seriously. She has no facial expression, she's not interesting to watch, she's not very attractive, and she can't deliver a line. She's just plain obnoxious, and being forced to watch her makes me want to have Laurent or Victoria eat her.

Well, with the next installation of the Twilight series coming out, critics are giving their reviews. A few of my favorites from Rotten Tomatoes (28% so far - I can't say I'm surprised) are below:

"If you fixate on funny things like plot and character -- in movies, anyway -- too bad." -Leslie Gornstein, E! Online

"Extreme moping by hollow actors makes the film feel like it stars robots stuck on their 'Emo' setting." -Matt Pais, Metromix.com

"Never has a man's shirtlessness been so essential to a character's development." -Jordan Hoffman, UGO

"The irony in this movie about vampires is that the only thing doing any sucking is the movie itself." Walter Chaw, Film Freak Channel

"The most surprising thing about New Moon, the second film in the Twilight series, is how much worse it is than the first." -Devin Faraci, CHUD

"Never have vampires and werewolves had so much estrogen." -Fiore Mastracci, Outtakes with Fiore

"I can't comment on the acting because I didn't catch Pattinson, Stewart and Lautner doing any. They basically primp and pose through the same humdrum motions they did before." -Peter Travers, Rolling Stone